Thursday, January 13, 2005

Blogs and relationships II

I've been continuing to think about the way that blogs change relationships. I must say that I do think there is something different about experiencing community "in the flesh" that blogs just can't replace.

Example: I used to go to a homegroup where there was a person who would drive me crazy almost every week. He would ramble on saying something I didn't understand, or wander off the topic, or make generalisations I didn't agree with, or tell the same story again and again and again. I got frustrated, bored, annoyed, and confused.

If he had been a fellow blogger, I would probably have stopped reading his posts long ago; but going to the same group as him meant I had to listen to him week after week. And you know, after a few months of this, I started to realise something: this person is really different to me. And really different to anyone else I know. He's the only person I know who's been homeless and a drug addict, who's a veteran of war and of two failed marriages, and who has a serious psychiatric disorder. And I could learn something from him because of that. I could listen to his random ramblings and his repetitive stories and realise that they're often just as valuable and as honest as any carefully thought out, well articulated contribution I might have. I learnt a little bit more humility. I learnt to be a little bit less elitist. I learnt to listen harder and to value what I heard more.

Of course, it might be perfectly possible to learn all the same lessons in the blogging world. But I guess blogs give you complete control over what you read. You don't have to listen to anyone else if you don't want to. You don't have to listen to their stories and their ideas, and you don't have to listen to their comments about your stories and your ideas. This is definitely possible in an "in-the-flesh" community, but I think it's harder.

The challenge is to combine blogs' freedom to be honest and to express dissenting opinions with in-the-flesh community. But I think it's possible! And for that reason, I hope that this blog is always only part of my experience of Christian community - a valuable part, definitely, but not the whole of it.

2 Comments:

At 8:46 pm, Blogger Mathieu said...

Well, you're off to a roaring start with the blogging!

I hope you have a good time here in the blogosphere.

I'm glad you liked St Michel. Anything else you liked in France?

 
At 11:24 pm, Blogger Anneke said...

Hi Mathieu,

Yes, lots of things I liked about France - the food, the atmosphere, the sense of history, the beautiful scenery, the interesting people... the thing I liked least, though, was not being able to speak the language. I was glad to be with a friend who does, as it made the whole experience much more enjoyable! I keep saying that one of these days I'll learn a second language, but never seem to have the motivation to get started and to stick to it. There is just too much to learn!

 

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